Seattle feels like a parenthesis of our life.
I sense this in my imaginations, which are cues to my longings.
I met another new family last week and have been eager to have said woman over for coffee. In the space between meeting and serving her coffee yesterday, I had convinced myself that she had moved to Fort Collins to be closer to CSU, host to Campus Crusade for Christ's big summer trainings... that she and her husband were on staff with CCC and that our easy connection and shared history would bloom into a lovely friendship.
Of course, no such thing was true. And I was humored at my own elaborate fantasy, immediately aware of the strangeness in wanting a CCC connection.
Until I realized this move seems like a continuation to something we paused 3 years ago. Not that ministry ceased in Seattle, but without the intensity of grad school and the confusing months of no direction, we are back to where we left off in a sense, before the parenthesis.
Now it seems that the sentence is going on...
3 comments:
Hey Beth,
Can you help me understand what you are saying? Are you saying that you are back to more purposeful ministry after pausing for an intentional learning/exploring time? That your feeling of connection to CCC has returned? Or am I still not understanding your thoughts here?
Would love to better understand.
Your Seattle "Swim Mom" friend,
Kim :-)
Kim! DId you do swim lessons and summer camp again this year? :)
I didn't know you were reading my blog. Thanks for wanting to clarify. I am having lots of feelings... perhaps it's culture shock and it is jarring odd memories? This is the city where we spent 5 weeks in CCC training 4 years ago and made the decision to leave Turkey and go to grad school in Seattle. And there are SO many more Christians here than in Turkey and Seattle that I kind of feel like the combination is making me feel like I'm in a CCC Truman Show or something. And it's wonderful! After years of living in a somewhat hostile or at best, ambivalent, atmosphere toward Christianity, I am really enjoying this. And as a result, I am freely speaking and beginning to really "announce" our ministry and purpose with delight and confidence.
So, perhaps it's the combination of feeling more accepted as someone in ministry and being truly focused again on something specific that makes me feel like Seattle was a pause.
Not sure if that makes any more sense!?
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